::A Geek in Korea::

I’m not on board the “Japan’s sexually dysfunctional culture is wacky!” meme. I mean, it is a weird culture, no doubt, but a lot of people are obsessed with Japan that have never been there. Just because it happens in Japan doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen elsewhere. Sure, a lot of weird things DO happen only in Japan, but that’s not a good reason to idolize their culture. Some things are best left “undid“.

For example, this article is basically “The Mystery Method” in Japan. Working on the theory that even a creepy dude like David Copperfield can get a girlfriend, other people use magic to trick women. BUT IT’S IN JAPAN. That’s worth an article? Must be a slow news day at Wired.

So, why am I blogging about it? Because of this quote:

“Since joining Mr. Fujita’s school, I have had five successful relationships,” says Hachioji Robocop, a 27-year-old civil servant who has been taking the course since 2004. “I lost my virginity six months into the course, and now I can now communicate with women. I’m very grateful.”

This guy’s name is Hachioji Robocop. ROBOCOP. A man with the last name Robocop should NOT have problems meeting women in Japan. They LOVE robots in Japan! Unless all the anime I’ve seen is leading me in the wrong direction, and all that “The Japanese are so weird” reporting is messing with my head, I imagine things heading in a terrible direction for this man because of his name when he approaches women.

Seeing as this is Japan, you’d expect H. ROBOCOP to simply stop a random woman on the street and say:

“PANTIES. DROP THEM. YOU HAVE 3 SECONDS TO COMPLY.”

Or, when things go badly on a first date:

“DEAD OR ALIVE, YOU ARE COMING WITH ME TO MY SMALL APARTMENT FULL OF LAME ANIME FIGURES.”

After whatever awkward pawing has left H. Robocop unsatisfied, he’ll realize what he’s done.

“MADAME, YOU HAVE SUFFERED AND EMOTIONAL SHOCK. I WILL NOTIFY A RAPE CRISIS CENTER.”