My son knows my wife provides him with far more important care than I do. He knows she feeds him 90% of the time, and spends the majority of time with him at night. If the two of us were sitting in the room and trying to get his attention, he is far more likely to watch his mother than his father. That’s fine. I’m not home with him as much, and that’s partially because of work, but also because hearing small infant children cry is not something I can tolerate for extended periods of time. When he gets on a crying tear while my wife isn’t around, I have a hard time keeping calm. His ferocious crying is ear piercing, and he is incredibly determined to let everyone else suffer until he gets what he wants.

This morning we had to take the kids to get a checkup because we don’t want the kids getting sick again this winter. We arrived at the hospital right before the lunch break, so while my son got checked out, my daughter needed to return for her checkup. We decided to go to a restaurant nearby for lunch ourselves, then return to the hospital to finish everything. While we were eating, my wife handed my son to me at the end of the meal, and I took a walk around the room. By the time I was back at the table, he had fallen asleep in my arms.

Since his checkup was done, I decided to just stay in the restaurant and  let him sleep for a while. I had electronic devices to keep me entertained while he slept. My wife took Glow and headed to the clinic for the checkup. After half an hour, he woke up and I met up with the rest of the family who was picking up the medicine for the week.

My wife wants more time out of the house with our daughter. Glow has been feeling jealous of all the attention her brother has been getting recently, so my wife decided to take her to a children’s musical at a department store. This is a thing they do together. My son and I were not invited. We went home, but since we didn’t bring the stroller, Arrow was strapped on my back in the carried. Because of my heavy coat hood, his neck was uncomfortable, and I was stooping over. Despite walking with a hunch to the subway stop, I got bothered by old ladies telling me that I was “carrying the baby wrong”. There was nothing to do but continue walking home.

By that time, it had been fifteen minutes of crying, but he persisted for an entire hour once we got home. He stood by the door screaming uncontrollably for the entire hour. I tried feeding him, giving him water, and checked to see if he needed a changing. He was all systems go for a scream for his mom, I guess. He was pretty insufferable to deal with, but I let him shout it out. During hour of constant crying, I tried picking him up a few times. Off and on he would stop crying, but he’d start back up pretty quickly.

Once he got to an hour and five minutes, I sent a message to my wife that she’d need to come home to deal with it, because I was losing my mind. She sent a message she was on the bus returning home, and suddenly Arrow fell right asleep and didn’t budge from my arms. He stayed fast asleep for two hours, pinning me to the couch. Luckily, again, I had access to electronic devices to keep me busy. My wife headed out with Glow again to pick up groceries since the bigger chains are closed this weekend, and once Arrow woke up and saw that she still wasn’t back, he flipped out again and started crying at the door.

I know Mom is great and all, but I was a pillow for two and a half hours today and I got nothing for it but this blog post. Anyway, his mom returned a few minutes later with food and he’s been happy, cheery, and bouncy ever since. I have been sitting around with a baby on my lap for a few hours without being able to do anything but poke at the news on my tablet, and now I could lay down and sleep myself for a while. I wonder if I just sat down and started crying while looking at the door if anyone would do anything for me?